thuvia ptarth (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
thuviaptarth) wrote2004-12-31 12:01 pm
thuviaptarth) wrote2004-12-31 12:01 pm
Entry tags:
My year in fandom
2004 was the year anime ate my brain.
... Do I need to say any more than that?
Stories written: Four real stories (Another Girl's Paradise (Alias), Remembering Amnesia (Angel), and the two Yuletide stories; seventeen drabbles and one double-drabble; three indulgences: Sunlight, untitled Gravitation/Saiyuki crack snippet, untitled Fullmetal Alchemist).
This isn't a lot for most people, but it's a lot for me. Certainly a lot more than I expected to write.
Fandoms: I wrote in nine fandoms, eight of them for the first time: Alias, Angel, Fullmetal Alchemist, Gravitation, Saiyuki, X, Yami no Matsuei, and two Yuletide mystery fandoms. I did not particularly take note of it at the time, but I also wrote m/m for the first time, long after having written m/f, f/f, and gen.
My favorite: I should probably pick something longer, but Rewritten on the Body. Possibly because it isn't long enough for me to get tired of it.
My best: Huh. Probably Yuletide #1.
Story most unappreciated by the universe: I can confidently predict that it's going to be Yuletide #2. Whether the obscurity is undeserved or not, I couldn't say.
Most Fun: Exercises in Genre Theory.
Funniest: Either Exercises in Genre Theory or the Gravitation/Saiyuki crack!snippet. This category is notable because I actually wrote humor. I'm still stunned.
Most Satisfying: You know, it's hard to pick. I am unexpectedly pleased with both Yuletide stories, not least because they contrast with each other nicely, but I am also inordinately fond of many of the drabbles: Pride, Rewritten on the Body, Memorial Service, 1997, The Dark Is Light Enough, and even Leave a kiss but in the cup, despite the sloppiness of some of the writing. And Exercises in Genre Theory was just plain fun.
Most Disappointing: Another Girl's Paradise. Can we start with the title?
I think I've made my peace with this story, which does have some good things about it, but the sad truth is it could have been much better if I'd started it ahead of deadline and given it a few more drafts. The one thing that works really well is the central power struggle between Lauren and Sydney, especially as demonstrated by the sex scene -- there's one sentence in there that more people quoted in comments/reviews than any other part of the story, and I agree, it's the sentence that gets the point of the story in a nutshell and it really, really works. But other parts of the same sex scene are painfully cliched, and the prose is wildly uneven. I had a really hard time finding my way into this story -- I had the sex scene very early, but I didn't know how to get there. Noir wasn't a bad solution to the problem, I think, but because I wrote it so hurriedly, the prose veers inconsistently between noir and my default stylistic tricks and doesn't do a very good job at either of them. With another draft or two, this could have been smoothed out. And I could have made Sydney's characterization -- and the degree to which Lauren misunderstood her -- much clearer; I'm not sure anyone got this.
Remembering Amnesia has some sections I like a lot, but as a whole it's too self-indulgent. It's possible I never saw S5 Wesley clearly enough; it was always a struggle to balance what Mutant Enemy obviously thought they were doing with Wesley/Fred and what, from my perspective, they accomplished instead.
I'll have some more to say about this after the Yuletide unveiling, but 2004, in addition to being the Year Anime Ate My Brain and the Year I Wrote Fanfiction Despite Resolving to Work on Original Fiction, was the year I became concerned about how lazy my writing had gotten. I feel like I've become a one-trick pony (honestly, I felt like Yuletide #1 couldn't have been more clearly mine if I'd just put my name on the first line), and I'm especially concerned about the way I've fallen into some very lazy habits in present tense. Weak verbs are much less noticeable in present than in past, as I realized when I tried to switch some sections from one to the other; I need to either write more in past tense or clean up my act in present.
Sexiest: Um. Probably "Another Girl's Paradise," despite its flaws; although "Rewritten on the Body" is by far the most romantic. Yuletide #2 should be in the running here, but I can't tell if it worked.
Hardest Story to Write: The ones I haven't finished yet? The Hisoka/Kamui thing is turning into another "Another Girl's Paradise," with the same damn central problem: I know what the sex should be, I know what's going to happen, I know what it's showing, but I don't know how to get them there. And I don't know how to transition from the sex scene to the final dialogue, even though I know the lines that nail the story shut.
Of the finished ones--well, maybe "Another Girl's Paradise," because I never did fix it. And writing explicit sex was a lot harder than I expected. Yuletide #1 was hell to figure out, but once I had the concept the writing was pretty easy. I'm not sure that I can legitimately call any story "hardest to write" if I snickered while composing some lines. Yuletide #2 should have been much easier, but wasn't--I had a horrible time figuring out what to leave out and what to put in, what knowledge could be assumed and what information had to be summarized and what shadings to give certain things.
Most Unintentionally Telling: Like I'm going to tell you if you haven't figured it out already.
Also, to be honest, I can think of a lot of intentionally telling things I used in this year's stories, but if there was something I was unaware of at the time, I probably still am. I can't remember rereading anything and having any big "Oh, shit" reactions.
Least telling is probably "Exercises in Genre Theory." Maybe that's why I like it so much.
Fanfiction plans for 2005: I still owe a bunch of people Election Recovery fic; I have two insane Yami/X crossovers I'm enamored of (damn you, Boni!); and it would be really nice to finish the Fujisaki story, although no one in the world will read it. I am not going to write the AU behind the "Strangers on a Train" exercise, because it would be too much work. I'm not. Not not not.
My year in fandom
I've been in an odd emotional place. My TV shows all got killed, and even before then I dropped![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
mutant_allies because of irreconcilable differences with fandom majority trends; a lot of people I met early in my fannish life have been transitioning out of fandom and/or our common fandoms; and there's a whole new set of anime/manga people, although I haven't really gotten very far into this, partly because of lack of emotional energy and partly because of--well, ageism and snobbishness. It's possible not everyone in the boards I hit randomly is fourteen years old, but there's a definite fourteen-years-old tone, and it gives me a headache. Y'all know I prefer the pretentious academic end of things. Critical analysis makes me happy.
So while I've become enthralled with a lot of new media, I haven't become that enthralled with a lot of new fandoms. And I've been doing a lousy job of keeping up with people I like as people rather than as fans. One of my new year's resolutions is, as always, to do a better job being a friend.
And in complete contrast to that was Vividcon, which was a delight. So.
... Do I need to say any more than that?
Stories written: Four real stories (Another Girl's Paradise (Alias), Remembering Amnesia (Angel), and the two Yuletide stories; seventeen drabbles and one double-drabble; three indulgences: Sunlight, untitled Gravitation/Saiyuki crack snippet, untitled Fullmetal Alchemist).
This isn't a lot for most people, but it's a lot for me. Certainly a lot more than I expected to write.
Fandoms: I wrote in nine fandoms, eight of them for the first time: Alias, Angel, Fullmetal Alchemist, Gravitation, Saiyuki, X, Yami no Matsuei, and two Yuletide mystery fandoms. I did not particularly take note of it at the time, but I also wrote m/m for the first time, long after having written m/f, f/f, and gen.
My favorite: I should probably pick something longer, but Rewritten on the Body. Possibly because it isn't long enough for me to get tired of it.
My best: Huh. Probably Yuletide #1.
Story most unappreciated by the universe: I can confidently predict that it's going to be Yuletide #2. Whether the obscurity is undeserved or not, I couldn't say.
Most Fun: Exercises in Genre Theory.
Funniest: Either Exercises in Genre Theory or the Gravitation/Saiyuki crack!snippet. This category is notable because I actually wrote humor. I'm still stunned.
Most Satisfying: You know, it's hard to pick. I am unexpectedly pleased with both Yuletide stories, not least because they contrast with each other nicely, but I am also inordinately fond of many of the drabbles: Pride, Rewritten on the Body, Memorial Service, 1997, The Dark Is Light Enough, and even Leave a kiss but in the cup, despite the sloppiness of some of the writing. And Exercises in Genre Theory was just plain fun.
Most Disappointing: Another Girl's Paradise. Can we start with the title?
I think I've made my peace with this story, which does have some good things about it, but the sad truth is it could have been much better if I'd started it ahead of deadline and given it a few more drafts. The one thing that works really well is the central power struggle between Lauren and Sydney, especially as demonstrated by the sex scene -- there's one sentence in there that more people quoted in comments/reviews than any other part of the story, and I agree, it's the sentence that gets the point of the story in a nutshell and it really, really works. But other parts of the same sex scene are painfully cliched, and the prose is wildly uneven. I had a really hard time finding my way into this story -- I had the sex scene very early, but I didn't know how to get there. Noir wasn't a bad solution to the problem, I think, but because I wrote it so hurriedly, the prose veers inconsistently between noir and my default stylistic tricks and doesn't do a very good job at either of them. With another draft or two, this could have been smoothed out. And I could have made Sydney's characterization -- and the degree to which Lauren misunderstood her -- much clearer; I'm not sure anyone got this.
Remembering Amnesia has some sections I like a lot, but as a whole it's too self-indulgent. It's possible I never saw S5 Wesley clearly enough; it was always a struggle to balance what Mutant Enemy obviously thought they were doing with Wesley/Fred and what, from my perspective, they accomplished instead.
I'll have some more to say about this after the Yuletide unveiling, but 2004, in addition to being the Year Anime Ate My Brain and the Year I Wrote Fanfiction Despite Resolving to Work on Original Fiction, was the year I became concerned about how lazy my writing had gotten. I feel like I've become a one-trick pony (honestly, I felt like Yuletide #1 couldn't have been more clearly mine if I'd just put my name on the first line), and I'm especially concerned about the way I've fallen into some very lazy habits in present tense. Weak verbs are much less noticeable in present than in past, as I realized when I tried to switch some sections from one to the other; I need to either write more in past tense or clean up my act in present.
Sexiest: Um. Probably "Another Girl's Paradise," despite its flaws; although "Rewritten on the Body" is by far the most romantic. Yuletide #2 should be in the running here, but I can't tell if it worked.
Hardest Story to Write: The ones I haven't finished yet? The Hisoka/Kamui thing is turning into another "Another Girl's Paradise," with the same damn central problem: I know what the sex should be, I know what's going to happen, I know what it's showing, but I don't know how to get them there. And I don't know how to transition from the sex scene to the final dialogue, even though I know the lines that nail the story shut.
Of the finished ones--well, maybe "Another Girl's Paradise," because I never did fix it. And writing explicit sex was a lot harder than I expected. Yuletide #1 was hell to figure out, but once I had the concept the writing was pretty easy. I'm not sure that I can legitimately call any story "hardest to write" if I snickered while composing some lines. Yuletide #2 should have been much easier, but wasn't--I had a horrible time figuring out what to leave out and what to put in, what knowledge could be assumed and what information had to be summarized and what shadings to give certain things.
Most Unintentionally Telling: Like I'm going to tell you if you haven't figured it out already.
Also, to be honest, I can think of a lot of intentionally telling things I used in this year's stories, but if there was something I was unaware of at the time, I probably still am. I can't remember rereading anything and having any big "Oh, shit" reactions.
Least telling is probably "Exercises in Genre Theory." Maybe that's why I like it so much.
Fanfiction plans for 2005: I still owe a bunch of people Election Recovery fic; I have two insane Yami/X crossovers I'm enamored of (damn you, Boni!); and it would be really nice to finish the Fujisaki story, although no one in the world will read it. I am not going to write the AU behind the "Strangers on a Train" exercise, because it would be too much work. I'm not. Not not not.
My year in fandom
I've been in an odd emotional place. My TV shows all got killed, and even before then I dropped
mutant_allies because of irreconcilable differences with fandom majority trends; a lot of people I met early in my fannish life have been transitioning out of fandom and/or our common fandoms; and there's a whole new set of anime/manga people, although I haven't really gotten very far into this, partly because of lack of emotional energy and partly because of--well, ageism and snobbishness. It's possible not everyone in the boards I hit randomly is fourteen years old, but there's a definite fourteen-years-old tone, and it gives me a headache. Y'all know I prefer the pretentious academic end of things. Critical analysis makes me happy. So while I've become enthralled with a lot of new media, I haven't become that enthralled with a lot of new fandoms. And I've been doing a lousy job of keeping up with people I like as people rather than as fans. One of my new year's resolutions is, as always, to do a better job being a friend.
And in complete contrast to that was Vividcon, which was a delight. So.
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I think I'm gonna volunteer for the NY Resolutions stories.
I wish you'd written more in "my" fandoms, but I'm happy you're having so much fun in anime/manga. Fun is good.
I'll do this meme. Just not right now.
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Yup.
I wish you'd written more in "my" fandoms, but I'm happy you're having so much fun in anime/manga. Fun is good.
Likewise! I feel a little wistful about watching all these people have so much fun in Stargate, which just does nothing for me; I wish I could play. But I'm really glad you're having a good time.
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